I had to bleach my hands up to 5 times a day in order to feel clean.
Living a life with OCD is like being a professional boxer. Every day is a battle: sometimes you win, sometimes you get knocked down, and sometimes you lose.
I battle every day with the monster inside my head, telling me to do things or avoid certain things in order to not become ill or contaminated. If the internal battle was not enough, the stigma and discrimination I face every day is heartbreaking. Every time I hear someone use the term ‘OCD’ to describe something which really is not OCD at all, it makes me want to curl up into a ball and bury myself in the sand.
What would people think of me if they could see what goes through my head on a daily basis? Would they think I’m crazy? Would they think I deserve to be locked up? This is why it’s so hard for myself and so many other OCD sufferers to talk about their illness and daily battle comfortably with others, and why so many suffer in silence.
Categories: The Wall
Trust me, I understand what you are going through. How much efforts you have to make to deal with OCD. How to explain it to others that OCD is also as dangerous and painful as any other major disease. But we can’t, they will never understand. Just 3 days ago someone told me that OCD is not an illness, it’s a state of mind 🙂
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I understand!
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