If I look at a plane passing overhead, it will explode and I’ll be responsible.
I think the worst thing for me is that a lot of my intrusive thoughts sound really, really stupid when I actually think about them. Of course I’m not going to lose control of myself and lick someone’s arm during a conversation. Of course saying I’m having a good day isn’t going to cause someone I love to die. Of course planes won’t explode if I accidentally look at them.
Worse are the fears that are very unlikely, but there’s still a chance. Will I feed my cats tainted food? Will I catch rabies by petting an outdoor cat? Will leaving my microwave plugged in burn my apartment complex down? Will taking a bath cause my bath tub to plummet through the floor into the apartment below mine? Probably not. “But there’s still a chance,” my OCD says. “It’s probably happened to someone, somewhere. You’d better go unplug everything and wash your hands and throw out any suspicious cans of cat food, just in case.” It’s really hard not to listen.
Categories: The Wall